Gracie Announces Her Candidacy

May 23, 2009

George: Coming down to the studio tonight I saw a big banner that said “Vote for Gracie.”

Gracie: Yeah, I know.

George: All over town I see billboards saying, “Put Gracie in the White House.”

Gracie: Uh-huh.

George: It’s in the news reels.  It’s in the papers…signs right here on the street saying, “Send Gracie to Washington.”  What does this mean?

Gracie: Well, George, I’ll let you in on a little secret.  I’m running for President.

George: You’re running for president?

Gracie: Yes.

George: Gracie, how long has this been going on?

Gracie: Well, for 150 years.  George Washington started it.

George: Gracie, why are you running for president?

Gracie: Well, because that’s the only way you can get to the White House.  You can’t just walk in and sit down.

George: The idea is preposterous.

Gracie: Not only that but it pays good money.

George: Look, you don’t stand a chance.  Gracie, presidents are born.

Gracie: Well, what do you think I was: hatched?

George: Listen, there’s nobody who would be happier about your success than I would.  But in the entire history of the United States there has never been a woman president.

Gracie: Yeah, isn’t it exciting and I’d be the first one.

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