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Harry Morton: Football Star

June 24, 2009

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Blanche: Oh, Harry, I forgot to tell you.  George and Gracie are going to the football game with us.

Harry: Oh, no.  Not Gracie.

Blanche: What’s wrong with Gracie?

Harry: Have you any idea what poor George takes from her?

Blanche: No, but I bet it’s a pretty penny.

Harry: Oh, stop that.  George could be a success without Gracie.

Blanche: Yeah, uh-huh, like Edgar Bergen without Charlie McArthy.

Harry: There’s a silly comparison, Blanche.  Bergen works with a dummy and George works… Okay, you win that point.  Anyway she doesn’t know anything about football.  She couldn’t pick the winner if Notre Dame was playing Vasser.

Blanche: This year who could?  Besides you’re not such an expert yourself, Harry.

Harry: You’re forgetting I played for Flushing A&M.

Blanche: Oh, no, Harry.  I remember.

Harry: I’ll never forget the big game.  What a day.  4,000 people in the stands yelling, “Give us Speedy.  Put in Speedy.  We want Speedy.”

Blanche: So they took you out and put in Speedy.

Harry: Well, I wasn’t in condition.  The night before I was up until 2 o’clock in the morning waiting for your folks to go to bed… so we could neck.

Blanche: They should have put Speedy in then, too.

Harry: Very, very funny, Blanche.  Could I read the paper… I’d like to read the paper….

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