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…And the Show Goes On…

April 12, 2010

 

GEORGE

Ladies and gentleman, thank you very much, and it’s very exciting for us to play here in London. We’d love to do a little more, but we’re not prepared.

GRACIE

I am.

GEORGE

(Continuing to audience)

It’s really a thrill for us to be so well accepted by you people.

GRACIE

I am.

GEORGE

I must tell you what happened when we found out we had been booked to play the Victoria Palace. Our Agent, Tom Fitzpatrick, told us that we were booked to play London for four weeks. We were thrilled, because although we had played in vaudeville all over America, we never dreamed that one day we’d be–

GRACIE

I am. If my brother Willie was here, I could do something alone if my brother was here. But my brother isn’t here so I’ll have to do something by myself.

(Turning to George)

My poor brother Willie, he was held up last night. Willie…my brother…was held up…last night…Willie…held up…my brother.

GEORGE

(Turning to Gracie)

Your brother.

GRACIE

He was held up.

GEORGE

Your brother was held up?

GRACIE

Yeah, by tow men.

GEORGE

Where?

GRACIE

All the way home.

GEORGE

Your brother must drink a lot.

GRACIE

So does my brother

GEORGE

Hasn’t your mother ever tried to do something about your brother Willie’s drinking?

GRACIE

She sent him to a psychiatrist, and the psychiatrist worked and worked to get to the bottom of his drinking, and finally he found out Willie’s problem.

GEORGE

What was it?

GRACIE

He likes to drink.

GEORGE

So does my brother.

GRACIE

Hasn’t your mother ever sent him to a–

GEORGE

Say good night, Gracie.

GRACIE

Good night.

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